uneasy ness and feeling hollow near heart and feeling like the old situation and events going to happen once again , i mean feeling like the bad days is coming but i dont trust it entirely cause i know its wrong but idk
bcz yesterday night mom behaved weirdly u know lil signs of paranoia and .. she described the . well she went for lil walk and then the neighbour and maybe people of our colony talked to her lil bit but she described the convo as hostile u know . if that woman said to mom that they seen me and my sis go for walk .. idk how to describe it but u know the residue of her paranoia i seen that in mothers talk when she described the events as if everyone is watching and plotting and evil u know.
and btw when i feel overwhelmed i shake(lil shaky hands) and other things but then i bring my hand forward and focus entirely on hands and i controlled everything no shake no flooding emotion nothing back to stable.
i want to cry im resisting cause i didnt slept yesterday and then today i slept whole day i just woke up at 4pm .
i dont want to cry cause i did yesterday night i dont want to cry again and again
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